Dallas Love Coaches Teach You How to Handle Your In-Laws

By Dallas & Fort Worth Singles Dating Service
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Sometimes it’s not easy to get along with your in-laws, especially when they have a different lifestyle and views than you. Just because they are your husband’s parents doesn’t mean you’re going to magically get along. Once you realize this, things will get better. Today, our Dallas love coaches here at Dallas & Fort Worth Singles will show you how to handle your in-laws, while promoting positivity all around.

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1. Don’t add fuel to the fire.

Try to resist the urge to argue with them. If you look for things to get upset about, well, you’re going to find them. And believe us, it will make it that much harder to get along with your in-laws. If you tell yourself things are going to be okay, things are going to be okay. Try to be positive and focus on the love you have with your partner instead of focusing on the differences you have with your in-laws.

Everything is in your head and you have the power to overcome these issues. You just need to fuel the relationship with positive energy instead of negativity. Even if they are negative, try to be positive because that represents who you are. You always want to be civil, respectful, and graceful in this type of situation. Lead by example and hopefully they follow your lead.

2. Handle your reactions appropriately.

You need to keep an eye on your words and how you say them. Always try to remain calm and breathe before you say something you end up regretting later. Remember, at the end of the day, they are your partner’s parents and you don’t want to disrespect them. Chances are you want to give them a piece of your mind sometimes, but our Dallas love coaches encourage you to keep it to yourself. Like we said, instead of finding the negatives, try to focus on positive things. Try to focus your energy on helping them have a good day instead of finding something to be angry about. Believe us, you’ll feel so much better. This may be difficult at first, but once you start letting little things roll off your back, you will be a lot less stressed, as will your spouse and family.

3. Use positive words and create boundaries politely.

If you want to keep the peace while establishing boundaries, you must communicate clearly and politely and use the right words. You can let them know you don’t want them giving your kids pizza or junk food without being offensive. The way you approach things and the words you choose will say everything. Instead of saying, “You’re always giving my kids junk food and soda,” try saying, “I’m trying really hard to teach my children healthful habits…” You see the difference here?

4. Don’t start gossip.

Have you ever met someone who is constantly gossiping? They’re a huge turn off, right? Well, you never want to do that with your in-laws. Instead of saying bad things about your in-laws, keep it to yourself. Don’t gossip about them to your friends or family. Even if there are a few things you don’t like about them, you can’t change them. And the sooner you understand this, the better it will be for everyone. Everyone lives a different lifestyle and has different ways of doing things, and just because you don’t agree on everything doesn’t mean you can’t try your best to get along.

5. Focus on their positive traits.

Even if you dislike that his dad smokes, or that his mom drinks soda in front of your children when you don’t allow them to drink anything but juice and water, try not to focus on these negative traits. Remember that they’re not out to get you and they have good traits as well. We all have flaws, but instead of focusing on their flaws, try to look at their good traits and all the nice things they do for you and your family. Appreciate the fact that his mom always welcomes you with your favorite apple pie or that his dad always invites you out to eat. Focusing on good traits can mean the difference between having a peaceful marriage and one that is at constant war.

6. Don’t get angry when your partner spends time with them.

It’s easy to get angry when your partner spends time with their parents, but they are his or her parents and your partner is allowed to spend time with them. Just because your partner wants to take them out to eat and spend time with them doesn’t mean they love you any less. You should never be jealous or resentful if your spouse spends time with their parents.

7. Understand that it’s not them you’re married to.

At the end of the day, you need to remember that no matter how complicated or difficult your in-laws are, you’re not married to them. When they are being difficult, try to understand that they don’t owe you anything. They are simply your partner’s parents and you’re not in a relationship with them. But it is in your best interest to make the most of the relationship you have with them.

8. Communicate directly.

Whenever possible, try to avoid relying on your partner to fix a problem. If something is happening that upsets you, try to communicate and address the problem right away. Often times, it’s a simple misunderstanding. You can avoid these misunderstandings by simply talking with them face to face instead of relying on your partner to relay the issue. Your partner’s in-laws might not realize they’re saying or doing something that is affecting you.

The best thing you can do is treat your in-laws with kindness and courtesy. Remember, at the end of the day, they are your partner’s parents and you should always be respectful of them. They don’t have to follow the same beliefs and lifestyle as you, and you shouldn’t get mad about it. Sometimes personalities just don’t mesh, and there’s nothing you can do about it. Our Dallas love coaches never want you to let your differences with your in-laws affect your marriage—or worse, your children’s relationship with their grandparents.

Do you have any other helpful advice for handling issues with in-laws? Share your tips with our readers on our Facebook page.

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